Saturday, May 12, 2007

Eternal Light

I worked 8 hours yesterday and spent 6 of them in my car. My body is screaming from pent-up energy. I had a slight headache when I got home at 4:00 yesterday which developed into a full-blown migraine within a short time (almost all of my migraines are food induced causing me great discomfort for 2 or 3 hours then I vomit and then I'm fine. Yesterday's migraine was tension induced so it didn't go away until I'd slept a good while).
I've got to take walking breaks every couple of hours when I'm out. It's pretty hard, though, when I'm in strange neighborhoods, sometimes in towns that are unfamiliar to me, to find a park or somewhere (other than the ubiquitous strip malls) safe to walk. Then I have to deal with my laptop (which, because of the sensitivity of the information in this survey, we're never supposed to leave in our cars-not even locked in the trunk) and try to keep from getting too sweaty out in this pre-summer in Tennessee heat and humidity.

I got up at 7:00 this morning, took the dogs out and went for a walk. Just a mile around the block but it felt really good to be out in the golden haze of morning light with the birds all asong, feeling my blood move and my muscles loosen. I thought about this world-it's impermanence. This material realm is not illusion, it's real. My physical body is important; it has it's own truth which I must honor and which includes healthy food and exercise. But my physical body is temporal; it will pass away, could do so at any time. My soul is my greater truth. That of God in me is my essence. This material world will pass away but the Energy, Love, the Divine Light that infuses all things will continue to shine like this morning's golden glow. The tricky part is learning what is temporary and what is eternal and honoring each as appropriate. I must attend to my physical being almost all the time (proper hydration, bathroom breaks, healthy food-but not too much, exercise, physical affection and intimacy of my loved ones) or I become unwell. As I've said, I want my life to be a reflection of God, to pray without ceasing. Learning to be aware of what is of God as I live this physical life is so hard: Remembering, even in the midst of a migraine headache, that it all comes from God and will go back to God.

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