Saturday, March 24, 2007

Blowing a gasket because of parasites

So, yesterday I went with a buncha people up to Bugtussle Farm in Kentucky ( and had a very nice time cutting up seed potatoes and planting them. I got a little sunburned and reinforced to myself that I do not have the constitution to be a farmer (besides the fact that I kill most green living things I come into contact with). I'm a city dweller at heart.

Hammy was able to go to work in the morning and then took our son to the Dr. It was confirmed that he has pinworms and so today we are deworming our bedding, clothing and selves. Each of us has to take one pill, one time and then bathe thoroughly. The risk of reinfection is high so all our bedding must be washed, vacuumed, or cleaned.

I took Hammy's (newer) car to Kentucky so he drove mine to the Dr. On the trip home, my car's engine blew a head gasket which means I no longer have a car (the car is too old with too many major systems that were breaking to replace the engine). We can not afford a second car payment. I took the social research project to pay off some debt we already have, we can't take on any more debt. But I can't do the research project gig without a car. My dad offered the use of his truck but I don't think I'm willing to take him up on it. My parents are more than generous and gracious but I think we need to deal with this without imposing on their kind offer. I'm leaning toward calling my field manager for the research project to tell her that I no longer have a car so I will not be able to do the assignment and then going up to the neighborhood grocery store and getting a job. I think maybe we should live with just the one car at least until we have it paid off and have a good down payment for the next car. We live a mile to a library, grocery store and the bus stop. If the boys and I cut back on the amount of commitments we make and simplify our schedule, I think we can go at least until next school year with only one car. Yes, it will require a lot of sacrifice and juggling of schedules, but there may be benefits, as well. I enjoy walking. I love the city and being around people and one doesn't experience either much from inside a car. I like the idea of polluting less and using a lot less fossil fuel. I like the idea of saving money on gas, car repairs, taxes, and insurance.

I think the person who will be most impacted will be Zed. I will have to be particularly creative and flexible about getting him together with his friends.

And, of course, buying a scooter is probably not even a consideration. Every penny earned will have to go into paying off Hammy's car. And I can't justify buying a scooter for a job that may only last 3 or 4 months. Sigh...
At least I'm not at risk of becoming disillusioned by my heart's desire.

Last night I went out with my old "gang". This is the group of women who were my main social support and community for almost a decade. We all homeschooled our kids and we did lots of classes, activities and field trips together. There was a point of more than a year during which we were together, in one facet or another, 4 or 5 days a week, easily. There were 7 of us at dinner last night plus one of us brought her mother. Of the 7, 4 of us have at least one child in public or private school. Only me and one other are actively homeschooling, the other two have children who are adults. I see a couple of these women almost weekly, another every couple of weeks because our sons are close friends but the others I don't see nearly often enough and I miss them.
One of the group is in the midst of a family crisis which is triggering a personal crisis. She needs moral support and that's why I organized the night out. As we sat and caught up on what's going on in our lives, it's helpful to know that everyone struggles. Money, teenagers, aging parents, too little time, too many choices, health issues, relationship discord, job successes and frustrations.
My friends were concerned about my car blowing up. One offered the use of the car she's getting ready to sell. Several offered advice. I don't feel badly about the car, or lack thereof. Just like I believe that God causes "way to open" I also believe "way closes" for a reason. I know that whatever happens, whatever Hammy and I choose to do, or not do, will be what is supposed to happen. There are lessons in borrowing from others, in going deeper into debt and in learning to simplify life. My intuition leans toward simplifying. We'll see what happens next...

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